Maternity Photos : Banner Lakes Summerset State Park Session

Historically, I have done a maternity post for each of our children and I want to treat this pregnancy and this child equally. A friend asked me the other day how this pregnancy is different than our others and tears immediately came to my eyes. I stalled in explaining the real answer by stating that instead of hurting to walk with bone-on-bone pain with our first, this is more muscular in nature and I’m doing physical therapy & yoga to keep things limber and the majority of the discomfort at bay. But then, I had to be truthful: the emotional side of this pregnancy is VASTLY different.

This child comes after YEARS of trying with medical assistance and she comes all on her own. The medical community calls this a “spontaneous conception”, meaning without medical interventions. She is the first “spontaneous” of our 6 pregnancies to make it out of the 1st trimester and only the 2nd spontaneous that we’ve ever had. We were blown away by what God was doing and His timing.

She is truly a fighter: An hour before our first ultrasound, I had some bleeding and therefore, my medical chart notes “threatened abortion”. The medical community knows this terminology means my body was showing signs of potentially miscarrying. And now, I know it too. But, low and behold, there was her heartbeat, strong in the 160s and she was measuring 9 weeks already. She had survived the Covid booster, other medications that I was on, and the strain of the month of December with Gerard’s job change & its aftermath.

We’ll see what her personality is like when she comes out, but man, if her activity in the womb: her fierce jabs, kicks and diva-like postures on ultrasound are any indication, she is sassy, feisty and won’t take crap from anyone. She has fought through and survived so much stress, grief, anger & sadness from her Mama’s recent experiences-she’s probably going to take the world by storm. She certainly has been a whirlwind for us and inspires me to keep pressing on. I am in awe of her.

So, while the physical nature of this pregnancy is comparable to her sibling’s, the emotions & events in our lives that she has grown through is a drastically different environment. It is that environment that brings me to the decision to only share images here that include myself & Gerard, not our other children. I feel the need to protect them from the public online sphere for the time being. This boundary may change in the future, but for now, this is where my trust level or “vulnerability scale” has us.

I offered a few ideas to our photographer, Austin Day, and let him know I was open to trying out a totally new location. We landed at Banner Lakes in Summerset State Park and it was a lovely evening! (minus some bugs and we avoided the poison ivy) The topography was really interesting and the views were beautiful!

I opened my Bible a few days ago to read through a part of Luke since our church is doing a series on that book. Oh the ironies of what my Bible opened to: “But I tell you who hear me: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.” (Luke 6:27) That’s been Gerard’s hope for both of us since December. In that particular month, my reading plan had me in Revelation. For each of our children, I’ve worked on memorizing a verse (or several) that represents where we are in life and how they fit in it, or what message I want them to know about the Lord.

Our first child’s was all of Psalm 139 where you find the “fearfully and wonderfully made” reference. I had a lot more brain capacity that pregnancy to memorize 25 verses! Our second child’s was 1 Peter 1:3-9. And just when I think what I have left to read in Revelation has nothing to offer, the following verses hit me square between the eyes after losing my Dad to leukemia just 6 months prior to reading it:

“Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven had passed away, and there was no longer any sea. I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be their God. He will wipe away every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” He who was seated on the throne said, “I am making everything new!” Then he said, “Write this down, for these words are trustworthy & true.”—Revelation 21:1-5

Truly, the old order of the way we do things in our family have passed away. We are adjusting to new rhythms and God has worked it for our good. As someone who grew up where earthquakes were a regular occurrence, I liken my experience to the aftermath of an earthquake: once you feel the ground shake beneath your feet, you question your next step differently. So, when the ground I walk on doesn’t seem trustworthy, solid or long-lasting, I know that the words my God has for me are, in fact, trustworthy & true. I want Baby Girl to know that, no matter what the world may throw at her out of left field, no matter how much the earth may shake under her feet, God is the Rock upon which we can trust to work all things for our good. That’s what she’s gotten to live through these last 37 weeks: her Mama’s emotions sorting all of that out and clinging to it in a whole new way.

I can’t wait for you to “meet” her and hear the story of her name. We appreciate your prayers for a smooth, safe & healthy delivery/recovery of both she & me.